looking at you 

glaring at me 

eyes like ice 

tongue blunt 

toying with my every thought 

my gaze shifts

staring at nothing 

the blade of your voice 

violent truths barreling into me

into my body

crushed bones, broken 

sticking out of skin

rusted nails threading through marrow  

holding these bones 

this body 

each layer of skin feels taught 

on this body 

that isn’t mine 

but belongs to me 

digging dirty nails into it 

peeling skin 

strip by strip 

until I can feel again

i still recall 

that feeling 

the day you…

a feeling similar to blade against skin 

cold and burning all at once 

raging over my body

this body 

that isn’t mine 

that blade 

crooked teeth tracing over my hip 

digging 

pressing 

against bone

I remember that feeling 

a fire like ice 

the memory of you

wandering through me 

like bugs under my skin

on this body 

a body I don’t recognize 

bugs crawling along my veins 

burrowing a nest within

a grey scratching pain

staring at nothing 

but you 

and those eyes like ice